Monthly Archives: February 2015

A wee poem about the Great Glen Paddle by the Fairy Pimp

The Great Glen Sup Challenge

Tartan Trail Fairies have a quest
To complete, it’ll have to be their best
The test,
Physically, mentally tough
The Great Glen Way upon a SUP

Travelling north against advice
The fairies did’nae think it twice
With steely grit
And legs, strong as girders
These gals are no yer average sisters

Setting off from Corpach
It’s warm, it’s dry, it’s still
With SUPs and fairies all pumped up
Anticipation, thrill

Lying on the bank at Moy
Fairies resting easy
Some food, some drink
A battle plan!!
It’s all a bit too easy

Loch Lochy entered, Confidence high
Wings flutter in the fall
But the fairies are taken unaware
By a full blown autumn squall
It hit them fast
To the shore they fought
Day one complete
Food for thought

Fairyboard windmills twirl in the breeze
Kilted fairies paddle with ease
A pine lined canal
Such a beautiful choice
The old swing bridge,
The start of loch Oich

In the heat of the day
There’s fairies at play
Headstands on boards
A shipwreck explored
And on through the loch
Till the end of the day
All’s going well
They’re nearly half way

Morning has brought a change in the weather
More of a wind blowing the heather
Today’s fairies look tough, as their costumes show
Superheros all
It’s the fab four fashion show

Caroline as Hula, all coconuts and cape
Julie as Popeye, with spinach to take
Tracy as She-ra, red, white, gold and blonde
Gillian, kickass! With a sword twelve inches long

Setting off for Augustus
Along the canal
The sight of our heroes
Anything but banal
Wind getting stronger
But our fairies won’t crack
Their motto, their ethos
There’s no turning back

A short day
An afternoon rest
But tomorrow, it’s Nessie
And are put to the test

Blow up Nessies, grass skirts and lei
That’s the fairywear order today
A strong gust blows past
All hope it won’t last
As the get out is fifteen miles away

A short stop for brunch
Another for lunch
With no sign of Nessie joining the fray
The sun riding high
Though not alone in the sky
An airshow unfolds
Flybys to behold
But the fairy formation
Takes all the acclamation

The fairies paddle on
Their carbs all but gone
Ness like a mirror
Not even a shimmer
Breaks through the picture they glide upon
Sunset detected
Urquhart reflected
It’s walls to be breached
Sanctuary reached
Four hardy souls
Surpass all their goals

The next day starts well
But by launch there’s a swell
Nessie has risen
To fairy derision
A decision is made
It’s cakes and lemonade

Referendum day
But which way will the fairies sway
At the end of loch ness
They each don a dress
Will the Saltire and Jack
Split up the pack
For Scotland, so near
The fairies, no way
The Great Glen complete
It’s big smiles today

By Andy Cochrane, the Fairy Pimp